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06E M P OW E R I N G T H E FA M I LYOCTOBER 2019The Prayer Of A Desperate Parent SeriesBy Uma Rudd ChiaAt different stages of our kids’ lives, they learn to deal with diverse andoverwhelming emotions. As parents, we try to protect our kids from what theworld deems as “negative” emotions. But as I raise my children, I’ve come torealise that the emotions the world deems as “negative”, such as sadness, guiltand concern, become intensified when we have Jesus as our Lord and Saviour.That’s because our conscience comes alive. We become sensitive to the thingsthat dishonour God, and there’s a constant need to humble ourselves beforeGod, and ask Him for forgiveness and grace to live righteous lives.We need to teach our kids how not to look at these emotions as positive ornegative, but to embrace and manage them as God-given, and with God’s help,to channel them towards pleasing God. When they respond to the voice of theirconscience, it guides them to walk before God with a pure heart.Matthew 5:8 (NIV) says, ‘Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God.’We want to raise kids who can see God in every situation—good and bad. Butthese emotions can be overwhelming and they create tension within the kids.Our kids need to know how to respond and channel these emotions towardsbecoming better people for God.Here are three typical emotional tension points and some principles to helpyour kids handle them right.1. GUILT VS CONDEMNATIONRomans 8:1 (NIV) says, ‘There is now no condemnation for those who arein Christ Jesus.’ But condemnation and guilt are not the same. It’s goodto feel bad when you’ve done something wrong. It means your consciencehasn’t been seared—it is alive and kicking.When Sarah told me she had done something wrong and asked how toget rid of her guilt, I recited 1 John 1:9 (NIV), ‘If we confess our sins, Heis faithful and just and will forgive us our sins.’ We talked through whatshe had done wrong—she had hurt her friend and felt bad about it. Iasked her if she had apologised and tried to make it right. She said yes,repeatedly.Then we bowed our heads and prayed. Sarah told God she was sorry andasked Him to help her be a better person and prayed for her friend tofeel better about the whole thing. Then she opened her eyes full of tears,smiled and said, “I feel much better, Mum.” We then agreed to put it asideand move on. I was glad that she was conscious of her wrongdoing. Itmeans she will think before hurting someone next time.Children are not too young to make their wrong right with the personthey’ve hurt and ask God for forgiveness when they do something wrong.As parents, we need to inculcate this as a good, Godly habit in them.2. DIVINE DISCONTENT VS DISSATISFACTIONOur kids need a holy discontent—a need to better themselves tobecome who God wants them to be. In a previous issue, I wrote about aconversation with my son feeling stressed because he wants to do wellin life. He has a constant desire to make himself better. That’s becausewithin each one of us is a raging battle between our need for convenienceand God’s seed of destiny in our heart. Within our children, their spiritman is pushing them towards excellence. Their spirit man knows whatGod has called them to do. God has put destiny in their hearts. But it’snot easy when their human nature is pushing for convenience, urgingthem to take the easy way out.Even in our Christianwalk, Paul says inPhilippians 2:12-13(NIV) to ‘work outyour salvation withfear and trembling’.Here Paul is nottalking about workingfor our salvation—Jesus has paid theprice on the crossfor that. He’s talkingabout working out oursalvation—in obedience to God.John Piper, the renowned theologian, reminds us that obedience forChristians is neither the rock upon which our salvation rests nor theoptional ribbon placed upon eternal life. It is essential. It is arduous. Andit is empowered by God. The desire and need to obey God isn’t just aboutobserving a set of God-made rules; it’s about finding our God-destinedpurpose and living it out to the fullest. And in that process, there will bea constant divine discontent pushing us to this purpose. We need to helpour children see this.The sad truth is, our kids can sometimes mistake dissatisfaction fordiscontent. Proverbs 19:23 says God satisfies us. He satisfies our soul withevery good thing. Dissatisfaction comes from a lack of gratitude and isnot the same as divine discontent. Where discontent pushes you fromyour slumber, dissatisfaction puts you in the seat of stagnation whereyou are so busy complaining about your situation that you refuse to lookfor the door out.When your kids murmur about things, push them to seek God and find away out. Help them with God’s grace and turn their dissatisfaction intodivine discontent.3. FEAR OF GOD VS FEAR OF MANWe teach our children that fear is bad. But not all fear is bad. ‘The fear ofthe Lord is the beginning of wisdom.’ (Proverbs 9:10; NIV). Fearing theconsequences of our actions stops us from doing stupid things that couldcause us our lives. Fear of burning ourselves stops us from jumping intoa bonfire. But the Bible also says that the fear of man is a snare, a trap. Wemust teach our kids to fear the right things in life and in doing so, facethe right fears boldly.“Mum, did I sin when I watched that movie?” “Mum, I said this to myfriend, is God displeased?” “I want God to know I love Him, Mum.” I loveto hear my kids being concerned about what God thinks and how Hefeels about their actions. They are learning to fear God and live for Hispleasure. We need to help our kids become God-conscious and notman-conscious.A pure heart comes from embracing our emotions, acknowledging ourweaknesses and having a heart that follows hard after God. Let’s raise kids asGod chasers, help them embrace their feelings and not shut them off or ignorethem, and channel them in a way that brings God honour.FreepikHELPING OUR KIDS DEALWITH THEIREVER-CHANGINGEMOTIONS

E M P OW E R I N G T H E FA M I LYOCTOBER 201907GRACE MARRIAGE COURSE (PLEDGE)By Vincent AngOn Saturday, 31 August, seven married couples attended the Grace MarriageCourse (PLEDGE) at the newly completed L4 Shalom at Grace@BukitBatok(GII). The marriage course was conducted by Vincent and Marie Ang whohave known each other since they were teenagers and have been married forthe past 25 years. The full-day course started at 10am with a break for lunchand finished at 5pm, just in time for the Saturday evening service.The Grace Marriage Course was missional in focus and there were twopre-believing couples who had signed up for the course. These couplesinvested a day of their weekend to improve their relationships and wantedto know more about becoming a better spouse to each other.The PLEDGE programme covers essential topics such as purpose, love,relationship, communication, emotional connection and setting couplegoals. Couples gained useful knowledge about love and respect, the 5 LoveLanguages, building intimacy, and conflict resolution. They also learnedabout God’s plan for their marriage and key biblical principles to supportand bring alignment to their lives as One.The couples engaged in deep meaningful conversations with each other totalk about sensitive topics as well as share general insights, experiences andwisdom with the other participants. Everyone, including the facilitators,learnt something new in order to improve their own marriages through thisdynamic and open interaction.The day culminated in an emotional bonding time with one another,pledges of love and commitment and a beautiful renewal of marriage vowsconducted by Pastor Benjamin Wong.These are some of the feedback shared by the couples that day: The marriage course gives guidance and tools to couples lookingto strengthen their marriage. Taking time out to work on yourmarriage is likely the most important thing you can do in life.Without a happy marriage, there is no happy family. – Gary Tan. This course can be taken repeatedly at different times of our liveswith relevant takeaways. Same evergreen principles and areas ofawareness can be highlighted, surfaced and reinforced, time andagain. – Emma. The Pledge Marriage Course helped my husband and I to open achannel of communication with one another. Definitely a goodstart to continuing communication and building a strongerrelationship with one another.– Course Participant. The genuine and spontaneous dynamics of Vincent and Mariegreatly helped to create an open and relaxed atmosphere for evendifficult and sometimes sensitive topics to be freely and openlyaired – George Lee. I would recommend as it is really necessary to always do healthchecks for marriage. – Qiu Ling. PLEDGE reminded both of us of the beginning from where ourcourtship started, with its purpose for matrimony.– Course Participant. A small investment for couples to enhance the understanding onhow to keep marriages active and enjoyable. – Course Participant.

08ENGAGING THE COMMUNITYOCTOBER 2019BE PART OF #PUSHUPFORYOUTH2019CHALLENGE—FROM NOW TO8 NOVEMBER 2019The inaugural #pushupforyouth 2018 social media fundraising campaignwas a success—thank you everyone for your support! Your posts of groupand individual videos of yourselves doing the 20 push-ups have encouragedmany to donate to REACH Community Services. More importantly, itraised the awareness of the plights of at-risk and vulnerable youth in ourcommunity, encouraging many to come on board to help. The money raisedwent to fund programmes that help youth deal with their situations.It is now time to work on #pushupforyouth2019. Once again, we needyour support.Our youth live in a complex world and encounter many formidablechallenges. While stable families can deal with these challenges, many invulnerable environments need our help. Statistics show that the number ofsuicides among boys aged 10 to 19 in Singapore last year were at a recordhigh*. This is worrying, so let’s do more for the youths in our communitythis year!Come, join us as we support our youths on their journey, and help themto activate their strength and potential. Here’s how you can take part in#pushupforyouth2019.You can take a video of yourself doing 20 push-ups in various ways: By yourself With a good friend– Celebrate your friendship in a meaningful way With your cell group or family– Those who serve together, stays together! With your colleagues, or sports and interest groups– Enhance your team spiritOr challenge yourself and attempt all four of the above!Through this campaign, we hope to garner 1000 video posts on social mediaand raise 100,000 this year.You can also be part of this movement by making direct donations viathe QR code. Your donations will be matched, dollar for dollar, by the BiCentennial Community Fund matching grant! Visit www.reach.org.sg formore information. Thank you for being part of this movement!*MOE, MSF ‘very concerned’ about spike in youth suicides; experts say more support and awareness uicides-experts-say-11775260

ENGAGING THE COMMUNITYOCTOBER 201909Grace Filipino MinistryNATIONAL FILIPINO LANGUAGEWEEK CELEBRATIONBy Linger Caryl AbellanaOn 25 August, the Grace Filipino Ministry (GFM) gathered for a specialfellowship in Grace@BukitBatok(GII). We celebrated Linggo ng Wika(National Filipino Language Week) by putting on a brilliant display of culturalhistory through our national costumes, national songs and national symbolsuch as the Filipino flag.A simple, yet heart-warming banquet featuring different Filipino delicaciesbrought back memories of our individual hometowns. In each other’scompany, the sense of nostalgia was overwhelming.Each Grace Missional Group (GMG) was assigned to prepare a Tagalog songfor the event, and the youth were in charge of judging the performances.It was an afternoon showcase of talents and unique presentations. Somegroups danced along with their members. Another mesmerised everyonewith a clever and creative selection of a Tagalog nursery song. With theirelaborate props, choreography and presentation, the group captured thecongregation's vote. But the ultimate winner was the group who presenteda short and fun musical skit about a man who fell in love with the woman ofhis dreams.As the event came to a close, everyone was reminded of the authenticity,resilience and harmony among Filipinos, and our colourful experiencesthrough history. It was an encouragingcelebration which whispered hopeand encouragement to all the Filipinoworkers who are looking towards thefuture of their families with bravehearts and are fulfilling their dreamsin a foreign land. It was as written inthe scripture: "Therefore encourageone another and build each otherup, just as in fact you are doing.”—1 Thessalonians 5:11 (NIV)Most importantly, it was a reminderfor everyone that the source of ourencouragement is in God alone. “TheLord himself goes before you and willbe with you; he will never leave you norforsake you. Do not be afraid; do notbe discouraged.”—Deuteronomy 31:8(NIV)Top: The GFM Youths as judges of thecompettion. Middle: D' Ambassadors GMGsinging Tagalog Medley including LeronLeron Sinta. Bottom: My Redeemer GMGreceiving their prize as first prize winner of thecompetition.Grace Missional Family—Region CBI-YEARLY MID-AUTUMN FESTIVALEVANGELISTIC LUNCHBy Madeleine WongOn 7 September, Grace Missional Family (GMF) Region C held a banquet atSAFRA Jurong for 370 guests, 149 of whom were pre-believers. It was the biyearly Mid-Autumn Festival Evangelistic Lunch, and we saw the hand of Godmove in a most unprecedented way!With every detail planned and the concerted effort of members inviting prebelieving guests, the Stage & Logistics Team received news of a change inour original guest speaker, Rev Oh Beng Kee.Our GMF expedited and stepped up prayer, not just for Rev Oh’s quickrecovery, but also for the Lord to send a replacement speaker for the hour.On the day of the event, Region C rejoiced as the Lord provided artiste FangZhong Hua (方钟桦), who captivated our guests with his story of how heturned from superstition and the worship of pagan gods to serving the trueand living God! Pre-believers with a similar background of ancestral andpagan worship identified with Fang Zhong Hua’s struggle with feng shui, fearand superstition. They laughed with him and enjoyed his wit and humour ashe recounted his journey in getting to know Jesus who died for him.The altar call led by our Regional Pastor, Pastor Lim Bee Ngor, was metwith an overwhelming response as pre-believing guests stepped forwardfor prayer. There were a total of six salvations among many who steppedout desiring to know more about Jesus and to receive physical healing. Atotal of 149 pre-believers heard the Good News proclaimed in a non-churchsetting—a restaurant! Indeed it was a demonstration of the church in actionas we went out to be the body of Christ ministering to the world out there!It was an exciting event that did not stop with Fang Zhang Hua’s songs,message and sharing! Bringing the whole event to a climax was a performanceby our very own Gracian and guest artiste Priscilla Phang, who won the topgold award in the 2019 MediaCorp Golden Age Talentime, a programmewidely viewed by pre-believers all over Singapore! Indeed, for the many whocame wanting to meet and hear Priscilla, they got to hear and meet the LordJesus Christ, Priscilla’s Lord and King to whom she gave all the glory!Other highlights of the afternoon include a sharing by Brothers Cheng TeeHiang and Steve Tan, who shared their own experiences of coming to Christ.Our pre-believing guests also got to play a Mid-Autumn piglets game. Duringthe game, our missional and engaging emcees, Garry and Esther, invitedthem to open the door of their hearts so that Jesus can come in to dinewith them, very much like what we were doing as a community, united andfeasting in the love of the Lord!We give thanks to God for His sovereign hand touching every singlepre-believer present at this banquet, a celebration to make Jesus known!Indeed, we believe and trust that the seed of faith has been sown andthat it is the beginning of God’s work in every life whom He has called byname to this cultural-turned-Godly event! All glory to God!Left: Artiste Fang Zhong Hua sharing his journey from darkness, superstition and fear to anew life in Jesus ChristRight: Pastor Bee Ngor gave a resounding altar call that brought many to step out to beprayed for and to recite the sinner’s prayer.

10OCTOBER 2019ENGAGING THE COMMUNITYGRACE PRISON MINISTRY VOLUNTEER —MY PERSONAL JOURNEYBy Joseph Saw, Grace Prison MinistryI was recruited into Grace Prison Ministry (GPM) more than 12 years ago.At that time, by the grace of God, I had just received a reprieve from a lifethreatening illness. To fulfill my thanksgiving promise to the Lord to serveHim wherever He sends me, I signed up for the Prison Ministry, not knowingwhat it entails.of the questions they ask are quite deep. It made me become aware that asteachers of God's Word, we must prepare well, know it intimately and neverlet our guard down. We can only teach what is correct if we first learn itourselves. Through all these, I get to further understand who God is and togrow in Him.I was previously a Sunday Christian and have never served in any ministry.Had I been approached to join GPM through any other ways than throughmy promise, I would probably have refused, believing that I was not up to it.And I was actually not up to it—I was shy, weak in bible knowledge, scaredto speak in public, and lacking in so many ways. The only thing I had of anyuse was my willingness to serve. To the Lord, it was enough. He providedall that was necessary. Looking back today, I find the transformation in methrough serving quite astonishing; our Lord is truly more powerful than wecan imagine.When I first joined GPM, I was not an outgoing person; in fact, I was quietand shy. I had virtually no experience in leading or speaking to groupsof people. I was very afraid of failure and rejection, but GPM gave me theopportunity to be a leader and speaker in the chapel services. Initially,I was often intimidated by my task, but God always gave me strengththrough the Holy Spirit, and through the support and encouragement ofmy fellow volunteers. Little by little, experience built up and in time, I grewto realise that it is a great honour to have been given this opportunity toshare God's Word with others. It became not a challenge but a blessing tome. Today, I thank God for that opportunity to grow not only spiritually butalso to develop into a more all-rounded person. GPM gives its volunteersopportunities in leadership and public speaking which few other ministriescan offer.Serving in GPM has brought me to meet people from different walks of life.In my eyes, before joining GPM, prisoners are dangerous people who shouldbe avoided if possible. They are people who will rob or steal from me if I givethem a chance, even after they have served their sentences. Serving in GPMallows me to get to know many of the prisoners personally and I realise thatthey are not very different from myself. The biggest difference is that theyare being punished for their sins while I am not. I am reminded that I ama sinner like them. Jesus had to die for my sins, just as He had to for theirs.My feelings towards the prisoners changed and I now regard them as mybrothers and sisters whom I love dearly.In learning about God's Word, the research that I did as part of my GPMduties showed me how little I really knew about what

Pastor Calvin and Sis Charis Registration & Payment Fee for non-credit or audit students: 15 Fee for 3-credit module: 130 Register at https://event.graceaog.org Or, at Grace Bookstore, L2 Koinonia, Grace@Tanglin (GI) Or, at Grace Reception, L1, Grace@Bukit Batok (GII) Closing Date: 21 October 2019 For further enquiries, please email to