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CONFESSIONS OF A REAL ESTATE MILLIONAIREIntroductionI am more of a speaker than a writer when it comes to communication– all my life I have found it easier to pick up the phone to contactfriends, family and business associates rather than write a letter. I willhowever, do my very best to make this book a journey. A journey thatwill hopefully inspire, a journey that will motivate and above all, ajourney that will educate.I remember starting very early on in my life as an educator – I nowrealise this began years before I ever walked out on stage. It startedwhen I was talking one on one to clients as an accountant some 20years ago. However things really started to take on a whole newdimension when a man I greatly respect and admire and nowconsider a mentor and a friend, Dr Dolf De Roos, said “When you areprivileged with the talent of knowledge and the ability to pass it on – itis your duty to do so”. I consider the public speaking that I do and thecourses that I run, and now the publishing of this book, a way ofgiving back to the industry that has provided me with success.A lot of sports people will understand this feeling and the almostcompelling duty I feel. It is the reason many formerly successfulsports players stay active local and club sports players in their chosensports long after their playing careers are over, by coaching,managing, administrating or being involved in some other way in asport that has given them so much joy over the years.The real estate industry is not unlike a game too. A game thatrequires much strategy, team building, persistence and discipline.Provided you put into practice all you’ve learned and keep learningfrom both your wins and your losses, success will come, and when itdoes, it is for life.12

CONFESSIONS OF A REAL ESTATE MILLIONAIREAuthor’s NoteThis book has been written in a duality style. You will start with myinvestment life story, taking you back to when things really started tochange for me. I will take you through all the stages of my investmentlife and how each step added to my wealth both in character and indollars.Every second chapter is an analysis or critique of that phase of mystory, which you will note is written in a different style font from the restof the text. This in-depth look at what I did, what I should or couldhave done differently will hopefully provide you the reader with asound set of tools, both economic and emotional, to better equip youfor your own financial success story. My story is not an uncommonone when you start to enquire about other people’s financial successand the reasons and strategies behind their success.Everyone will have their own idea of what success, and in particularfinancial success, means to them. For some it will mean becoming amillionaire, for others it will mean having enough money to retire andmaintain their current standard of living and for others it will meanincreasing their standard of living and their lifestyle dramatically.For me, it meant replacing the income which I was working 40 – 60hours a week to earn in my accounting practice with passive incomethat comes in regardless of what I chose to do with my time. It meantbeing able to spend time with my kids while they were still young andnot time with my grandkids in 20 to 30 years time. As a single Mum,time was what was most important, and it was money, in particular,passive income, that was going to give me that freedom.I hope my story may inspire you to achieve the same.13

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CONFESSIONS OF A REAL ESTATE MILLIONAIREChapter 1Such is the life of a single mumThe sun was just starting to set over the hills in the crimson sky.Slowly it was fading from a vibrant red and orange to a muted pinkand blue. It was like this most afternoons along the Queenslandcoast, but I wasn’t on the beach or the deck enjoying the view, witha drink in my hand. Once again I found myself sitting in the officealone, surrounded by files which I should have been working on tofinish a client’s job before they came in the next day As I sat there, daydreaming out the window, I realised that I hadcome a long way from the insecure divorcee who had moved to thebeautiful Sunshine Coast just a few years prior with a baby in armsand heavily pregnant with my second child. I had made the 40,000I got in a divorce settlement go a long way. I now owned a quaint15

CONFESSIONS OF A REAL ESTATE MILLIONAIREtwo-bedroom fibro cottage in a good position in the hills whichshadowed the coastline, half an office, and half an accountancypractice which, although it was still a fledgling business, wasshowing good promise and produced sufficient income to makeends meet for myself and the kids.Yes, I had much to be proud of, and much to be grateful for. Yetstill I found myself dissatisfied, sitting in my office, with piles ofclients’ files covering the floor around my desk, watching the clockto make sure I didn't miss the 6.30pm deadline to pick up my twochildren from day care. I simply couldn't afford the dollar a minutethey charged if you were late picking them up. I had been caughtwith that before. My mood was definitely melancholy, not exactly a“Woe is me” attitude, but more a “What am I doing here?”, “Wheream I heading?” kind of attitude.I looked around my office, and although the furnishings were basic,they were quite comfortable and professional. My fingers absentmindedly played with the leather armrests of my 800 chair that Ihad so proudly purchased after my first six months of trading. Myrationale for buying such an expensive item was that I intended tosit in the chair for probably the next 15 years, so it might as well bea good comfy chair. On this particular day however, that samethought was daunting, and scared me to the core. How couldanyone want to sit in the same chair, in the same office, doing thesame thing for 15 years. Okay, so some people do, but I knew rightthen at that moment, I certainly didn’t.I had always been a restless spirit. As a child, I was like the freerange animals on my parents’ farms. I didn’t like to be caged up. Iliked to wander about and discover new beautiful things in myworld. My family were all a little nomadic too. None of my brothersand sisters fitted the “stay in the family home forever” mouldeither. Somewhere in the lead up to, and the hurt of the divorce I16

CONFESSIONS OF A REAL ESTATE MILLIONAIREhad changed. Only two years before when I was fresh out of thedivorce, I felt the need for security and routine, and knowing whatthe next day held. Now though, I was restless and had outgrownthe cocoon of absolute security and normality I had initially craved.I was getting back to my true personality. I was again becoming theperson I had been as a child and young adult before the later part ofmy marital experience messed up my emotions!It had taken me several long, hard years to regain my selfassurance, my self-confidence and get back to being me, theindividual, not me, the person who had to consider, and in fact bowdown to the opinions and actions of another person. Even though Iwould consider myself a strong person, and I certainly didn'tendure any physical abuse like so many other women (in fact likesome friends of mine were exposed to, as their marriagesdisintegrated), I still felt at some deep level an insecurity that mymarriage had failed because somehow I wasn't a good enough wifeto keep the marriage alive.Years of mental manipulation and snide, insinuating comments hadcertainly made some pretty big dents in what I had thought, as aconfident teenager/young adult/newly-wed, was an armour-platedself-esteem. Clearly I was wrong.I believe a lot of this feeling of failure came as a result of my strictCatholic upbringing where no one is supposed to get divorced. Noone in my family had ever been divorced. In fact, at the time I wasgoing through the emotional rollercoaster of a failing marriage, Ididn’t even know any friends or work associates who had beenthrough a divorce or could offer any real life experiences as support.Of course it’s a very different story these days. I know I am in theclear majority, where over half the population has been divorced.Not that these statistics are at all comforting.17

CONFESSIONS OF A REAL ESTATE MILLIONAIRE“You made your bed, you lie in it.” I heard my mother’s wordsechoing in my head. “Oh! He’s only a man, you have to makeallowances,” said my aunt who had been married to only one mansince she was a teenager. The trouble was, my bed got a littlecrowded with a long list of other women (girls), over the years and Iwas feeling claustrophobic!I finally realised no matter how much one half of a marriage tries, itcannot make a marriage. Towards the end, my marriage hadbecome a game of cards, where I simply didn’t want to lose thegame. I hated losing. I had always been very competitive and verysuccessful at sports, academically at school, and in my professionallife. I then found myself in a marriage game I had little control overand could not win. My life at that time was a “soap opera” and Ineeded to turn the television off!Looking back now I realise at that stage, I was only just starting toget back to the person I really am. It had taken two years. Since thedivorce, my life had been a whirlwind of hard work, juggling theestablishment of my accountancy practice and children's needs,sicknesses and runny noses.My thoughts were abruptly jarred back to the present when afamiliar voice boomed from a doorway. “Are you still here? You’dbetter get a wriggle on, it’s 25 past six and don’t you have to pick upthose two gremlins by 6.30pm?” Ted the surveyor from next doorenquired with a beaming smile on his face.“Oh shit, thanks Ted! Yes, I’d better fly,” I replied in a fluster.Then my other life began for the day. Clock out of one job, clock into another. I quickly shut up the office, leaving my nine o'clockappointment file strewn over my desk, wondering what excuse Icould give as to why their accounts were not completely finished,18

CONFESSIONS OF A REAL ESTATE MILLIONAIREand bolting down to the car so I could make it to the day care centreby 6.30pm. “Such is the life of a single mum” I thought to myself.With my three-year-old Justin and my two-year-old Samanthasafely bundled into the car along with clothes, nappies, lunch boxesand sleeping sheets, I tried hard to listen intently to them chat awayabout their days. Both children were full of energy and eager to talkabout every detail of their day and show me countless drawingsand paintings on paper and various items of construction fromcardboard and egg cartons. Like most children, they both talked asfast as they could, at the same time, and at top pitch, withoutthought that their tired and frazzled mother was having troubletaking it all in.Having grown up in the country where shopping took place onceevery two months, I had always known how to cook a meal fromvery little, which was a life saver as a single Mum with limitedfunds. I was always able to throw together a meal from a tin of tunaand left over veggies from the day before. Long ago I had learnt toalways cook more than was needed in the veggie department sothey could just be reinvented the next day.More kiddies talk, a play on the carpet, baths and a bed time storymeant my day of responsibility was nearly over.It’s certainly a lot easier being an accountant than a mother – butbeing a mother is far more rewarding.As I ran a hot bath – this time for myself - my thoughts drifted backto big picture stuff again – me, and what I really wanted from mylife. If I continued doing what I was doing – without being apsychic of any kind, I could pretty well predict what my life wouldhold in the future. I would continue to cope with the double life I19

CONFESSIONS OF A REAL ESTATE MILLIONAIREled of ‘in control, professional accountant’ by day, and ‘out ofcontrol mother of two’ by night and weekends.My business would continue to grow from client referrals due to theactive marketing campaign I had instituted of scheduling a timeevery week to get out and talk to business owners in their workplaces. I would introduce myself and my growing business to them,and offer my accountancy practice services to them. This was acampaign I found to be highly successful, yet one which myprofessional colleagues found highly amusing and very out ofcharacter for an accountant – not the done thing at all in what wasstill a very stiff profession.I would continue to advise clients on what they should be doingwith their future, their business, their retirement planning, how toprotect their assets, save money on their taxes and basically runtheir lives – yet I had absolutely no idea what I should be doingwith my own life. I could continue to sit in my 800 chair for thenext 15 years. I would continue to contribute to superannuation –maybe build up enough equity to buy an investment property –maybe somewhere where I might like to retire.The idea and the picture I was painting was depressing as I laythere in that bath, and it made me feel like I was drowning in myown reality. How was I ever going to make any significant changefor myself and my family if I continued on the path I was on?The question shot pangs of hurt through my chest as I thought ofthe two little beings asleep in the next room – so innocent and sototally dependent on whatever decisions I made. No longer was itjust about me – if I made the wrong decisions I would be totallystuffing up their lives as well! A familiar feeling of fear started tocreep in and I recognised that it was at this point in my thoughtpatterns where I usually decided this line of thought was too hard20

CONFESSIONS OF A REAL ESTATE MILLIONAIREand I would wash it away with a glass of wine, or by watchingmindless rubbish on TV.But that night was somehow different, I felt enough pain to want tobreak through the seemingly endless circle my life was in. Whatdid I need to do differently? What did I need to change? What didI really want anyway? What significant difference could I make inmy life that would make me a better Mum? What hurt the most,was feeling like I was being a lousy Mum.For some time, through sheer necessity (or so I thought), I hadworked from 7.30 in the morning to 6.30 at night and brought fileshome from work on most weekends. This meant that I was usuallytoo tired and cranky to be the happy, light hearted, spontaneousMum I wanted to be. I was simply too tired and focused on tryingto make ends meet.Those past two years had been hard beyond belief, and never againdo I want to stand at the grocery store counter in trepidation as Ihand over my credit card – not knowing whether it is going toaccept the transaction or not. Cold shivers run down your spine asyou wait to see if you have to make up an excuse as to why fundshaven’t cleared or whether you breathe a sigh of relief that you haveescaped for another week.That night I sat up for hours, alone and thinking. Thinking andwriting down all the things I wanted in my life. How I wanted myperfect day to take place. How I wanted to be and act with mychildren. All the things I wanted to have as part of my life bothfinancially and emotionally. I broke these burning desires intocategories – financial, lifestyle, family, emotional, social, communal(who I was in my community and what I could contribute), spiritualand of course the all important, fun factor - the fun that I wanted inmy life and my kids’ lives.21

CONFESSIONS OF A REAL ESTATE MILLIONAIREI let my pen have free reign. To do this, I first had to let myanalytical mind blow out the window and forget the barriers ofwhat I considered possible and what I considered fanciful or justdreaming.The experience was exhilarating and uplifting. I felt I had a newlease on life and a second burst of energy on a night when I wouldnormally have been thoroughly exhausted from the day’sresponsibilities.Once again I fell asleep on the couch, only this time the TV was noton and my unconscious mind continued to ponder the thoughts ofmy future, and what it could be, as I slept.22

CONFESSIONS OF A REAL ESTATE MILLIONAIREChapter 27 Undercover emotions thatcan change your financial destinyIt is a painful realisation to look at your life and suddenly see that it isnot at all how you had expected it to be. It i

Dymphna Boholt not only delivers you the appropriate skills required to achieve real estate wealth and success, she goes deep into the mind, the heart and emotion that all millionaires go through. You don’t become a real estate millionaire overnight, h