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Feature Article - Feature Article – Feature Article – Feature Article(continued)Long lines to obtain visas. Armed military guards and mandatory baggage inspection in anticipationof the national election next week. Humid heat even at midnight. Disorder in the dark parking lot.Swarming mosquitoes. No seat belts in an antiquated transport van. Mile after mile of shantytowns.Dirt and disrepair. Unsightly scenes out every window. Reality.Cindy smiled. It was a different smile. She felt the shock of a cold shower at 70 km/hour. ―I neverwould have let you come,‖ she said but then winked. Her smile expressed informed faith. Ugandahad not changed within the past hour – she had. Alignment with actuality. Devotion despite reason.Reality.Children believe in God. Innocent faith. At some point in time, experiences challenge beliefs.Informed faith learns from experience. The universe does not change – we do. Assurance of thingshoped for. Evidence of things not seen. Reality.Love and HateMay 19, 2011. Before coming to Uganda last August, I solicited advice from several Fulbrightscholars who had been here the previous year. One of them said simply, ―You will love it, and youwill hate it. Prepare for extremes.‖Most days I have loved it. Occasionally I become frustrated. Sometimes I wonder if I have done anygood at all. Today was one of those days. I started grading an examination that I had given in classtoday. Most students struggled to apply the material. Or they had been too polite to say that they hadfailed to understand my thick accent. Irrespective of the reasons for the students’ performance, I wasfighting with despair. I had come to UCU to support the students in their research, and I had failed.Then in the afternoon, the students from my previous class invited my family and me to visit theirclassroom. Most of them had successfully passed their research proposals, and they wanted toexpress appreciation through some gifts to us. I had never before received so much gratitude. Theyfelt my love for them, and they returned that love. With African enthusiasm, the students prayed andsang with hands raised in praise to God. I consider that moment with those students worth everyeffort we have made to come here.I later reflected on the fact that this same group of students had largely failed in their initialperformance eight months ago. I wondered if I had done any good at all. I fought against despair.AMCAP Spring 2012 5

Feature Article - Feature Article – Feature Article – Feature Article(continued)When you give your heart, prepare for extremes.We are All BeggarsMay 27, 2011. Four ragged boys approached me on the street, ―You give us money.‖ They ranged inage from six to ten. They were dirty and undernourished, but they were not street children. Theywere likely from families that could not or did not pay for uniforms and school fees (about 40 peryear). These children clearly did not have any money, and I clearly did. It was a simple request froma simple source. But giving is not so simple.On my first visit to Uganda, I had given money to a begging child who looked exactly like theseboys. A Ugandan friend scolded me, ―Why did you give him money? He may never go to school.Why would he go to school when he can stand here and get money from tourists?‖ Ouch.I wish that my mistake could be undone, but the scale of the damage is so vast that it cannot becounted. Billions of dollars of foreign aid have improved conditions in Uganda, but they have alsofostered dependency on foreign aid. For instance, some subsistence farmers wait for free seedsbefore they will plant, so they go hungry by failing to save seeds from their own crops.Poverty alone does not produce dependency. Congo has received less foreign aid than Ugandabecause of political instability. The people suffer from many hardships, but some do reasonably wellin certain essential aspects – precisely because they cannot depend on donations from outsideagencies. Aid is absolutely necessary when resources are unavailable, but after the basic resourceshave been provided, self-reliance is the next essential commodity. A farmer cannot work withoutseeds, but after seeds have been provided once, instruction should replace donation.At the very time the four ragged boys approached me on the street, I was thinking about selfreliance. Just a few minutes earlier, a Ugandan friend had asked me to solve a problem for him, and Ihad given what he asked. As I walked along the street, I was feeling disturbed that this friend hadgotten into the habit of expecting something from me every time we were together. I had fostered hisdependency.So I determined to try a different strategy with these four ragged boys. I asked them to follow me toa store nearby. I spoke with the owner and asked him if he had any work that the boys could do forabout an hour. He did. I explained that I would give him the money to pay for their work. Theowner started talking to the boys, and I left them to their work.AMCAP Spring 2012 6

Feature Article - Feature Article – Feature Article – Feature Article(continued)about an hour. He did. I explained that I would give him the money to pay for their work. The ownerstarted talking to the boys, and I left them to their work.I do not know the outcome, but I do know that these boys’ problems are systemic. They are caught ina system. It is estimated that more than half of all school fees in Uganda are paid by foreign aidorganizations. I personally believe that education is one of the greatest investments that we can make,but even this type of financial support has unintended consequences: Many parents who find asponsor to pay school fees see no need to save money for next year’s fees, so they do not. Someparents who do not find a sponsor this year hope that they will find one next year, so they do not saveeither. These four boys will likely never further their education. They are trapped in a system, needintensified by dependence.I believe that God wants us to give. He gives to us. He expects us to share what we are given. A fewweeks ago, I was holding a clear plastic bag that had the remnants of my lunch, some crumbs ofbread. A girl nearby asked for the bag. She was that hungry. I had crumbs. I can give. Simplesolution. But giving is never simple. As soon as I had given her the bag, three boys approached andasked for some food. I did not have any more, so I asked the girl to share what little there was withthem too. She clutched the bag tightly, so the boys attempted to take it away from her. I stopped thefight by taking back my bag, crumbs intact. I told the girl that she could have shared, even though itwas little, and I told the boys that they should not take what was not theirs. I tried to teach them.What none of them knew was that a lunch had been prepared for them. I escorted them to the meal,and they feasted. I later reflected on how this experience may be somewhat like what God does withus. He gives, but He expects us to share, even when we have little. He teaches us to not take whatothers have been given. If we apply these lessons, our needs will be supplied. We are all beggars.We may fight over crumbs, but there is a feast prepared if we follow Him.God shows us how to give correctly to one another. We can learn from His example. He loves us butdoes not give us everything that we ask. He does not remove the painful consequences of our choices.Rather, God gives in ways calculated to help us progress. We are pathetically impoverished in truthand goodness, but God sees that we are capable of sacrifice, of sharing, of creating opportunitiesourselves. Giving is a responsibility. We must give responsibly. The efficacy of our giving dependson our ability to foster that same spirit of giving in others. That is no simple task. It requires acomplete shift in paradigm. Giving responsibly entails intensely hard work.AMCAP Spring 2012 7

Feature Article - Feature Article – Feature Article – Feature Article(continued)Final PostAugust 10, 2011. A curtain is closing on a chapter of our lives, and we endure the pain that comesfrom loving too much to leave.The curtain will remain partly opened because our family started a charitable organization that willcontinue after we return to the U.S. Working with local people, we received government approval toprovide aid to children with disabilities in Mukono. The projects include assisting families unable toafford school fees and providing physiotherapy to help young children learn to walk. Typicallychildren with disabilities in Uganda remain housebound; their parents cannot afford corrective therapyor surgery. We met children who had spent their entire lives in a small hut. Without the ability towalk, the children cannot attend school. They remain isolated, shut away from the world outside theirdoor.Our daughters named the organization ―Uniting Children (Uganda)‖ because they want children withdisabilities in Uganda to experience social interaction and receive an education. They have alreadyseen success. A child who took his first steps with them cried to see them leave. That child willcontinue to receive treatment, but there are many others in need of assistance.We have seen how God answers prayers through other people moved by compassion. We have nocomprehension of hunger, sickness, or violence, but we have seen over and over again that God does.He loves too much to ever leave us. The curtain remains partly opened.TimSmith,Ph.D.,isaProfessorofCounseling Psychology at Brigham YoungUniversity.Hisresearchfocusesonmulticultural psychology and the psychologyof religion. He is a fellow of the AmericanPsychological Association and is currentlyworkingonabookonmulticulturalpsychology to be published by APA.AMCAP Spring 2012 8

(Contiued from p. 1) her undergraduate degree at BYU. Jill was a verybright, accomplished student and, given thedifficulties she

accepted to a prestigious MSW program in the Eastern U.S. Jill joined the Church in high school, on her own. Her mother left when Jill was very young. Her father died when she was in high school. Jill completed a mission and then thdid (Continued on p. 9) Photo