Transcription
.HE PRACTICEOF THE RESENCE OF GODHE BEST RULE OF A HOLY UFBfornianaltyBROTHER LAWRENCE
THE WARD THORNTONS112 Second AvenueChula Vista, CaliforniaLIBRARYpresented to theLIBRARYUNIVERSITY OF CALIFORNIASANbyFRIENDS OF THE LIBRARYWard L. ThorntondonorDIF.GO
N VERSITY OF CALIFORNIAn3 182202751 8810THE PRACTICEOF THEPRESENCE OF GOD
CONVERSATIONSO/UJICHQLAS (HERMANandofLETTERSLORRAINEBROTHER LAWRENCEIntroduction byHannah Whitall SmithNEW YORKFleming H. Revell CompanyLos ANGELESLONDONGLASGOWDistributed b Scriven r & CoAve.6007 BartonLos Angeles 38
Copyright, 1895,byFLEMING H. REVELL COMPANY.Translated from the FrenchPrinted in the United States of America158 Fifth Avenue, New York 10, N.Y.2173 Colorado Blvd., Los Angeles 41, Calif.29 Ludgate Hill, London E.C. 4, England229 Bothwell St., Glasgow C. 2, Scotland
ContentsINTRODUCTIONPREFACE7iiCONVERSATIONSFIRST CONVERSATIONSECOND CONVERSATIONTHIRD CONVERSATIONFOURTH CONVERSATION13162124LETTERSFIRST LETTER3ISECOND LETTERTHIRD LETTERFOURTH LETTERFIFTH LETTERSIXTH LETTERSEVENTH LETTEREIGHTH LETTERNINTH LETTERTENTH LETTER3339414446485O5 I53
ContentsELEVENTH LETTERTWELFTH LETTERTHIRTEENTH LETTERFOURTEENTH LETTERj7FIFTEENTH LETTER61jjjgO
But I fear, lest by any means, as the serpent beguiled Evethrough his subtlety, so your minds should be corrupted fromthe simplicity that is in Christ. II Corinthians 11:3.THEvalue of thissimplicity.Thelittlebookis itsextremetrouble with most of the re-day is its extreme complexity."Brother Lawrence" was not troubled withligion of theany theological difficulties or doctrinal dilemmas. For him these did not exist. His one singleaim was to bring about a conscious personalunion between himself and God, and he tookthe shortest cut he could find to accomplish it.The result can best be described in his ownwords: "Ifdare use the expression, I shouldchoose to call this state the bosom of God, forIthe inexpressible sweetness which I taste andexperience there."WhatBrother Lawrence didallcan do.Notheological training nor any especial theological views are needed for the blessed "practice"
Introduction8he recommended.Nogorgeous churches, norritual, couldstately cathedral, nor elaborateor mar it. A kitchen and an altarone to him; and to pick up a strawfrom the ground was as grand a service as toeitherweremakeaspreach to multitudes. "The time of business,"not with me differ from the timesaid he, "doesof prayer; and in the noise and clutter of mykitchen, while several persons are at the sametime calling for different things, I possess Godin as great tranquillity as if I wereknees at the blessed ok, therefore, seems toof the most helpful I know. Itofuponbeings, letfitsthem beinto the livesrich or poor,or unlearned, wise or simple.Theat her wash-tub, or the stone-breakeron the road, can carry on the "practice" heretaught with asance of successmucheaseandasmuchassur-the priest at his altar or themissionary in his field of work.All must feel that anything that brings theasoverworkedand poverty-stricken humanity, in the midstof its ignorance and its helplessness, is a pricereligion of Christ within reach oflessboon, and thisiswhat Brother LawrenceHis "practice" requires neither time, nortalents, nor training. At any moment, in thedoes.
Introduction9midst of any occupation, under any circumstances, the soul that wants to know God can"practise the presence" and can come to theknowledge. The Lord Christ of hosts is withGodour refuge, let the"seemings" be what they may; and we needbut to recognize this as a continual, ever-pres-us,theof Jacobisent fact, and the inexpressible sweetness towhich Brother Lawrence attained will becomeours.HANNAH WHITALL SMITH
'aceTHIS bookconsists of notes of severalcon-versations had with, and letters written by,Nicholas Herman, of Lorraine, a lowly andunlearned man, who, after having been a foot-man andamongsoldier,was admittedaLay brotherthe barefooted Carmelites at Paris in1666, and was afterwardknownas"BrotherLawrence."His conversion, which took place when hewas about eighteen years old, was the result,under GOD, of the mere sight in midwinter ofa dry and leafless tree, and of the reflections itstirred respecting thewouldbring.Fromchange the coming springthat time he grew emi-nently in the knowledge and love of GOD, en-deavoring constantly to walk "as in His presence." No wilderness wanderings seem to haveintervened between theRed Sea and the JordanAof his experience.wholly consecrated man,he lived his Christian life through as a pilgrim,ii
12as aPrefacesteward and notasan owner, and diedatthe age of eighty, leaving a name which hasbeen as "ointment poured forth."The "Conversations" are supposed to havebeen written by M. Beaufort, Grand Vicar toM. de Chalons, formerly Cardinal de Noailles,by whose recommendation the "Letters" werefirstpublished.The book, within a short time, went throughrepeated editions, and has been a means ofblessing to many souls. It contains very muchof that wisdom which only lips the LORD hastouched can express, and which only heartsHe has made teachable can receive.May this edition also be blessed by GOD,andredound to the praise of the glory of His grace.
CONVERSATIONFIRSTTHE firstupontimeIsaw Brother Lawrence wasthe }d of August, 1666.GOD had done himHetoldmethata singular favor in his con-version at the age of eighteen.That in the winter, seeing a tree stripped ofits leaves, and considering that within a littletime the leaves would be renewed, and afterthat the flowers and fruit appear, he receivedview of the providence and power ofGOD, which has never since been effaced fromhis soul. That this view had perfectly set himloose from the world, and kindled in him sucha love for GOD that he could not tell whethera highhad increased during the more than fortyyears he had lived since.itThat he had been footman to M. Fieubert,the treasurer, and that he was a great awkwardfellowwho brokeeverything.13
Conversations14That he haddesired to be received into amonastery, thinking that he would there bemade to smart for his awkwardness and thehe should commit, and so he shouldsacrifice to GOD his life, with its pleasures; butfaultsthat GOD had disappointed him, he having metwith nothing but satisfaction in that state.That we shouldestablish ourselves in a senseof GOD'S presence by continually conversingwith Him. Thatit was a shameful thing toHisconversationto think of trifles andquitfooleries.That we shouldfeeland nourish oursoulswith high notions of GOD; which would yieldus great joy in being devoted to Him.That we ought to quicken i.e., to enlivenour faith. That it was lamentable we had soand that instead of taking faith for themen amused themselveswith trivial devotions, which changed daily.little;rule of their conduct,That the way of faith was the spirit of thechurch, and that it was sufficient to bring usto a high degree of perfection.That we ought to giveourselvesuptoGOD,with regard both to things temporal and spiritual, and seek our satisfaction only in the fulfillingof His will, whetherHelead usby
Conversationssuffering orby1 5consolation, forwould beThat thereallequal to a soul truly resigned.needed fidelity in those drynesses or insensibilitiesand irksomenessesin prayerour love to Him;make good and effectual acts oftriesfor us tonation, whereof one aloneveryby which GODthat then was the timeresig-would oftentimesmuch promote our spiritual advancement.Thatasfor the miseries and sins he heard ofwas so far from wondering at them that, on the contrary, he was surprised that there were not more, consideringthe malice sinners were capable of; that, forhis part, he prayed for them; but knowing thatdaily in the world, heGOD could remedy the mischiefs they did whenHe pleased, he gave himself no further trouble.That to arrive at such resignation as GOD requires, we should watch attentively over allthe passions which mingle as well in spiritualthings as in those of a grosser nature; that GODwould givethosethiswhowaslight concerning those passions totruly desire to serveHim. Thatifmy design, viz., sincerely to serve GOD,might come to him (Brother Lawrence) asoften as I pleased, without any fear of beingtroublesome; but if not, that I ought no moreIto visit him.
16ConversationsSECOND CONVERSATIONThat he had always been governed by love,selfish views; and that having resolvedto make the love of GOD the end of all his actions, he had found reasons to be well satisfiedwith his method. That he was pleased when hecould take up a straw from the ground for thewithoutlove ofelse,GOD, seekingnot even HisHimonly, and nothinggifts.That he had been long troubled in mindfrom a certan belief that he should be damned;menworld could not havepersuaded him to the contrary; but that he hadthus reasoned with himself about it: I engagedthatallthein thein a religious life only for the love of GOD, andI have endeavored to act only for Him; what-ever becomes of me, whether I be lost or saved,always continue to act purely for the loveI willof GOD. / shall have this good at least, that tilldeath I shall have done all that is in me to loveHim. Thatof mind had lasted fourwhichtimehe had suffered much;years, duringbut that at last he had seen that this troublearose from want of faith, and that since he hadpassed his life in perfect liberty and continualjoy. That he had placed his sins betwixt himand GOD,this troubleas itwere, totellHim that he did not
Conversationsdeserve His favors, but that17GODstillcontin-ued to bestow them in abundance.That in order to form a habit of conversingwithtoGODcontinually, and referringHim, we mustsomediligence;at first apply tobut that after aallwe doHimlittlewithcareweshould find His love inwardly excite us toitwithout any difficulty.That he expected, after the pleasant daysGOD had given him, he should have his turn ofpain and suffering; but that he was not uneasyabout it, knowing very well that as he coulddo nothing of himself,givehimGOD wouldthe strength to bearnotfailtoit.That when an occasion of practising somevirtue offered, he addressed himself to GOD,saying, LORD, / cannot do this unless Thouenablest me; and that then he received strengthmore than sufficient.That when he had failed in his duty, he onlyconfessed his fault, saying to GOD, I shall neverdo otherwise if You leave me to myself; it isYou who must hinder my falling, and mendwhat is amiss. That after this he gave himselfno further uneasiness about it.That we ought to act with GOD in the greatest simplicity,plainly,speaking toHimfrankly andand imploring His assistance in our
1Conversations8they happen. That GOD neverfailed to grant it, as he had often experienced.That he had been lately sent into Burgundy,affairs, just asbuy the provision of wine for the society,which was a very unwelcome task for him, because he had no turn for business, and becausetohe was lame and could not go about the boatbut by rolling himself over the casks. That,however, he gave himself no uneasiness aboutit, nor about the purchase of the wine. Thathe said to GOD, // was His business he wasabout, and that he afterward found it verywell performed. That he had been sent intoAuvergne, the year before, upon the same account; that he could not tell how the matterpassed, but thatitproved very well.So, likewise, in his business in the kitchen(towhich he had naturallya great aversion),having accustomed himself to do everythingthere for the love of GOD, and with prayer,upon all occasions, for His grace to do his workhad found everything easy, during fifteen years that he had been employed there.That he was very well pleased with the postwell, hehe wasnow in;but that he wasasready to quitthat as the former, since he was always pleasinghimself in every condition by doing littlethings for the love ofGOD.
Conversations19That with him the set times of prayer werenot different from other times; that he retiredto pray, according to the directions of hissuperior, but that he did notwant suchretire-ment, nor ask for it, because his greatest business did not divert him from GOD.Thatinallashethings,knewandhis obligation to loveGODhe endeavored so to do, hedirector to advise him, butashad no need of athat he needed much a confessor to absolvehim. That he was very sensible of his faults,but not discouraged by them; that he confessed them to GOD, but did not plead againstHim to excuse them. When he had so done, hepeaceably resumed his usual practice of loveand adoration.That in his trouble of mind he had consultednobody, but knowing only by the light of faiththat GOD was present, he contented himselfwith directing all his actions to Him, i.e., doingthem with a desire towould come of it.That useless thoughtspleaseasletwhatspoil all; that the mis-chief began there; but thatthem as soonHim,we perceivedwe oughtto rejecttheir impertinenceto the matter in hand, or our salvation, and re-turn to our communion with GOD.Thatat thebeginning he had often passed
ioConversationstime appointed for prayer in rejectingwandering thoughts and falling back intohisthem. That he could never regulatebycertain methods asless,at first hesomehisdevotiondo. That, neverthe-had meditated for some time,off, in a manner hebut afterward that wentcould give no account of.Thatallbodily mortifications and other exexcept as they serve to arriveercises are useless,at theunion withwell consideredGOD bythis,love; that heand foundithadthe shortestto go straight to Him by a continual exercise of love and doing all things for His sake.wayThat we ought to make a great differencebetween the acts of the understanding andthose of the will; that the first were comparatively of little value, and the others, all. Thatour only business was to love and delight ourselves in GOD.That all possible kinds of mortification, ifthey were void of the love of GOD, could notefface a single sin. That we ought, without anxiety, to expect the pardon of our sins fromthe blood of JESUS CHRIST, only endeavoringto love Him with all our hearts. That GODseemed to have granted the greatest favors tothe greatest sinners, asof His mercy.moresignalmonuments
21ConversationsThat thegreatest pains or pleasures of thisworld were not to be compared with what hehad experienced of both kinds in a spiritualstate; so that he was careful for nothing andfeared nothing, desiring only one thing ofthat he might not offend Him.That he had no scruples; for, saidGOD,viz.,I fail inhe,whenmy duty, I readily acknowledge it, say-am used to do so; I shall never do otherwise if I am left to -myself. If I fail not, then Igive GOD thanks, acknowledging that theing, Istrength comesfrom Him.THIRD CONVERSATIONHetoldmethat the foundation of the spir-him had been a high notion andesteem of GOD in faith; which when he hadonce well conceived, he had no other care atitual life inbut faithfully to reject every otherthought, that he might perform all his actionsfor the love of GOD. That when sometimes hefirsthad not thought ofGODfor a good while, hedid not disquiet himself for it; but, after having acknowledged his wretchedness to GOD, hereturned to Him with so much the greatertrust inHim as he had found himself wretchedthrough forgetting Him.
22Conversationswe put in GOD honors Himmuch and draws down great graces.That thetrustwas impossible not only that GODshould deceive, but also that He should longlet a soul suffer which is perfectly resigned toHim, and resolved to endure everything forHis sake.That he had so often experienced the readyThatitsuccors of divine grace upon all occasions, thatfrom the same experience, when he had business to do, he did not think ofbut whenitas in a clearThat ofwas timemirror,toalldoit,beforehand;he found in GOD,that wasitfitforhimtohe had acted thus, without anbutbefore the experience aboveticipating care;mentioned, he had used it in his affairs.do.lateWhen outward business diverted him a littlefrom the thought of GOD, a fresh remembrancecoming from GOD invested his soul, and soinflamed and transported him that it was difficult for him to contain himself.That he was more united to GOD in his outward employments than when he left themfor devotion and retirement.That he expected hereafter some great painof body or mind; that the worst that couldhappen to him was to lose that sense of GODwhich he had enjoyed so long; but that the
Conversationsgoodness ofGODassured him.himforsakeutterly, and thathim strength to bear whatever23He would notHe would giveevil He permit-happen to him; and therefore that hefeared nothing, and had no occasion to consultwith anybody about his state. That when hehad attempted to do it, he had always comeaway more perplexed; and that as he was conted toscious of his readiness to laythe love of GOD, he haddownhis life forno apprehension ofdanger. That perfect resignation to GOD waja sure way to heaven, a way in which we hadalways sufficient light for our conduct.That in the beginning of the spiritualwe oughtlifeto be faithful in doing our duty anddenying ourselves; but after that, unspeakablepleasures followed. That in difficulties we needonly have recourse to JESUS CHRIST, and begHis grace; with that everything became easy.That many do not advance in the Christianprogress because they stick in penances andparticular exercises, while they neglect the loveof GOD, whichplainlywebytheirThat this appearedworks, and was the reason whyisthe end.see so little solid virtue.That there needed neithergoing toGOD, but onlyart nor science fora heart resolutely de-
Conversations24termined to apply itself to nothing but Him,or for His sake, and to love Him only.FOURTH CONVERSATIONHe discoursed with me frequently,and withgreat openness of heart, concerning his mannerof going to GOD, whereof some part is relatedalready.He told me that all consists in one heartyrenunciation of everything which we are sensible does not lead to GOD. That we might accustom ourselves to a continual conversationwith Him, with freedom and in simplicity.That we need only to recognize GOD intimatelypresent with us, to address ourselves to Himwe may beg His assistanceHiswillin things doubtful, andknowingevery moment, thatforfor rightly performing those which we plainlyHe requires of us, offering them to Himbefore we do them, and giving Him thanksseewhen we haveThatalsoin this conversation withemployedHimdone.God weareand lovinggoodness andin praising, adoring,incessantly, forHisinfiniteperfection.That, without being discouraged on accountof our sins, we should pray for His grace with
Conversationsa perfect confidence, as relyingfinite meritsof our25uponthe in-LORD JESUS CHRIST. ThatGODnever failed offering us His grace at eachaction; that he distinctly perceived it, andnever failed ofit,wandered fromunlesswhen his thoughts hada sense ofGOD'S presence, orhe had forgotten to ask HisThat GOD always gave uswhen we had noHim.assistance.light inour doubtsother design but to pleaseThat oursanctification did not depend uponourworks, but in doing that forchangingGOD'S sake which we commonly do for ourown. Thatitwas lamentable toseehow manypeople mistook the means for the end, addictingthemselves to certain works, which they per-formed very imperfectly, by reason ofhumantheiror selfish regards.That the most excellent method he hadfound of going to GOD was that of doing ourcommonbusiness withoutany view of pleasingweare capable) purelymen,* and(as far asfor the love ofThatitwasGOD.a great delusion tothink thatthe times of prayer ought to differ from othertimes; that we are as strictly obliged to adhere* Gal. i:10;Eph.6: 5, 6.
26toConversationsGOD byaction in the time of action asbyprayer in the season of prayer.was nothing else but a senseofof the presenceGOD, his soul being at thattime insensible to everything but divine love;Thathis prayerand that when the appointed times of prayerwere past, he found no difference, because hestill continued with GOD, praising and blessingHim with all his might, so that he passed hisin continual joy; yet hoped that GOD wouldgive him somewhat to suffer when he shouldlifegrow stronger.That we ought, once for all, heartily to putour whole trust in GOD, and make a total surrender of ourselves to Him, secure that Hewould not deceive us.That we ought not to be weary of doinglittlethings for the love of GOD,whoregardsnot the greatness of the work, but the love withwhich it is performed. That we should notin the beginning, we often failed inour endeavors, but that at last we should gainwondera habit,if,whichwill naturallyin us, without our care,produce its actsand to our exceedinggreat delight.That the whole substance of religion wasfaith, hope, and charity, by the practice ofwhich we become united to thewill ofGOD;
Conversationsthatallbesidesis27and to be used asarrive at our end, and beindifferent,means that we mayswallowed up therein, by faith and charity.That all things are possible to him who bealieves; thatto him whomore easy to him whomore easy to him who perseveresthey areless difficulthopes; that they areloves,andstillin the practice of these three virtues.That the end we ought to propose to ourselves is to become, in this life, the most perfectworshipers of GODhope to be throughThat when wewewe canallenterpossibly be, asweeternity.the spiritual life,should consider and examine to the bottomwhat weare.Anduponthenweshould find our-worthy of all contempt, and not deserving indeed the name of Christians; subject toall kinds of misery and numberless accidents,selveswhich trouble us and cause perpetualvicissi-tudes in our health, in our humors, in our internaland externalsonswhom GODandlabors, as wellthisdispositions; in fine, per-would humble by many painswithinwe should not wondertations, oppositions,pento ustrary, tofrom men.aswithout. Afterthat troubles, temp-and contradictions hapWe ought, on the con-submit ourselves to them, and bear
Conversations28themaslongasGODpleases, as thingshighlyadvantageous to us.That the greater perfection a soul aspiresafter, the more dependent it is upon divinegrace.*Being questioned by one of his own society(to whom he was obliged to open himself) bywhat means he had attained such an habitualhimsense ofGOD, hecomingto the monastery, heGODasasthetoldthe end ofmarktoallhisthat, since his firsthad consideredthoughts anddesires,which they should tend, andwhich they should terminate.That in the beginning ofhis novitiateinhespent the hours appointed for private prayerin thinking of GOD, so as to convince his mindand to impress deeply upon his heart, thedivine existence, rather by devout sentiments,and submission to the lights of faith, than byof,studied reasonings and elaborate meditations.That by this short and sure method he exer-knowledge and love ofGOD, resolving to use his utmost endeavor tolive in a continual sense of His presence, and,cised himself in theif possible,never to forgetThat when he had thus*TheparticularsHimmore.in prayer filled hiswhich follow are collected from othercounts of Brother Lawrence.ac-
Conversations29mind with great sentiments of that infiniteBeing, he went to his work appointed in thekitchen (for he was cook to the society) Therehaving first considered severally the things his.office required, and when and how each thingwas to be done, he spent all the intervals of histime, as well before as after his work, in prayer.That when he began his business, he said toGOD, with a filial trust in Him: O my GOD,since Thou art with me, and I must now, inThy commands, apply my mindoutward things, I beseech Thee to grantme the grace to continue in Thy presence', andto this end do Thou prosper me with Thy assistance, receive all my works, and possess allobedience toto thesemy affections.As he proceededin hishis familiar conversationwork he continuedwithhisploring His grace, and offering toMaker, im-Himall hisactions.Whenhe had finished he examined himselfhow he haddischarged his duty; if he foundwell, he returned thanks to GOD; if otherwise,he asked pardon, and, without being discouraged, he set hisuedhis exercisemindright again, and contin-of the presence ofhe had never deviated fromhe,"byrising afterit.GOD"Thus,"as ifsaidmy falls, and by frequently
3OConversationsrenewed acts of faith and love, I am come to astate wherein it would be as difficult for menot to think of GOD as it was at first to ac-custom myself to it."As Brother Lawrence had found such an advantage in walking in the presence of GOD,itwas natural for him to recommend it earnestlyto others; but his example was a stronger inducement than any arguments he could propose. His very countenance was edifying, sucha sweet and calm devotion appearing in it ascould not but affect the beholders. And it wasobserved that in the greatest hurry of businessin the kitchen he still preserved his recollectionand heavenly-mindedness. He was never hastyloitering, but did each thing in its season,with an even, uninterrupted composure andnor"The time of business,""does not with me differ from the timetranquillity of spirit.said he,of prayer, and in the noise and clatter of mykitchen, while several persons are at the sametime calling for different things, I possess GODin as great tranquillity as if Iwere uponknees at the blessed sacrament."my
FIRST LETTERSINCE you desire so earnestly that I shouldcommunicate to you the method by which Iarrived at that habitual sense of GOD'S presence,which our LORD, of His mercy, has been pleasedto vouchsafe to me, I must tell you that it iswith great difficulty that I am prevailed on byyour importunities; and now I do it only uponthe terms that you show my letter to nobody.If I knew that you would let it be seen, all thedesire that I have for your advancement wouldnot be able to determineIcan give youme toit.The accountis:Having foundinmanybooksdifferentmethods of going to GOD, and divers practicesof the spiritual life, I thought this would serverather to puzzle me than facilitate what Isought after, which was nothing but how tobecome wholly GOD'S. This made me resolve
Letters32to give theallfor themyself wholly toaway myall;so afterGOD, thathaving givenHemight takesin, / renounced, for the love ofHim,everything that was not He, and I began towas none but He and I in theworld. Sometimes I considered myself beforelive as if thereHim as a poor criminalat the feet of his judge:Him in my heart as myFATHER, as my GOD. I worshiped Him theof tenest that I could, keeping my mind in Hisat other times I beheldholy presence, and recallingitasoftenas Iwandered from Him. I found nosmall pain in this exercise, and yet I continuedfounditnotwithstanding all the difficulties that occurred, without troubling or disquieting my-it,when my mind had wandered involuntarily. I made this my business as much all theselfas at theappointed times of prayer;for at all times, every hour, every minute, evenin the height of my business, I drove away fromday longmy mind everything that was capable of interrupting my thought of GOD.Such has been my common practice everand though I havedonevery imperfectly, yet I have foundgreat advantages by it. These, I well know, areto be imputed to the mere mercy and goodnesssince I entered in religion;it
Lettersof GOD, becauseHim, and33we can donothing withoutwethan any. But when/ still lessare faithful to keep ourselves in His holy pres-ence, and setHimalways before us, this notonly hinders our offending Him and doing anything that may displease Him, at least wilfully,butit alsobegets in us a holy freedom, and, ifmay so speak, a familiarity with GOD, wherewe ask, and that successfully, the graceswe stand in need of. In fine, by often repeatingIwiththese acts, theyence ofGODbecomerenderedand the pres-habitual,as itwere natural tous.Give Him thanks, if you please, with me, forHis great goodness toward me, which I cannever sufficiently admire, for themanyHe has done to so miserable a sinnerMay all things praise Him. Amen.Ifavorsas Iam.am, in our LORD,Yours, etc.SECOND LETTERTo the ReverendNot finding my mannerhave nothoughIgreatersecurity, I shallofdifficultythoughts concerningit.life inaboutbe glad tobooks, al-it,yet, forknow your
Letters34In a conversation some days since with aperson of piety, he told me the spiritual life waswhich begins with servile fear,which is increased by hope of eternal life, andwhich is consummated by pure love; that eachof these states had its different stages, by whicha life of grace,one arrives atlast atthat blessedconsumma-tion.Ihave not followedthe contrary,fromIallthese methods.know not whatOninstincts,found they discouraged me. This was thereason why, at my entrance into religion, Itook a resolution to give myself up to GOD, asIthe best returnIFor thefirstcouldmakefor His love, and,Him,to renounceyear Icommonly employed my-for the love ofall besides.during the time set apart for devotion withthe thought of death, judgment, heaven, hell,selfmy sins. Thus I continued some years, applying my mind carefully the rest of the day,and even in the midst of my business, to theandpresence of GOD,-withAtme, oftenlengthIwhomas incameIconsidered always asme.insensibly todo the samething during my set time of prayer, whichcaused in me great delight and consolation.This practice produced in me so high an esteem
Lettersfor GOD that faithme in that point.*Such wasmythat for thealonewas capable tosatisfybeginning, and yet I must tellten years I suffered much.youThe apprehension thatGOD35firstIwas not devoted towished to be, my past sins alwayspresent to my mind, and the great unmeritedfavors which GOD did me, were the matter andas Isource ofmysufferings.DuringthistimeIoften, and rose again presently. It seemedto me that all creatures, reason, and GOD Himself were against me, and faith alone for me. Ifellwas troubled sometimes with thoughts that tobelieve I had received such favors was an effectof my presumption, which pretended to be a
BROTHERLAWRENCE. THEWARDTHORNTONS 112SecondAvenue ChulaVista,California LIBRARY presentedtothe LIBRARY UNIVERSITYOFCALIFORNIASANDIF.GO by FRIENDSOFTHELIBRARY WardL.Thornton donor. NVERSITYOFCALIF
